.. 20:26 hrs

soccer trials was good& smooth for me initially.
notice the use of that word.
we did some ball control, yeah that was easy.
but i DIED when it came to 4-a-side
get this, i, SCORED, AN, OWN, GOAL
the cross hit my knee& i sposed my knee loved the net.
NO seriously, im disappointed, im sad, im synonymous-with-whatever-negative-emotion-you-can-find-in-the-dictionary
but what can i do ?
ill just have to know im not good enough

i dont expect the call because i know i confirm wont get in one lar FUCK.
shit haha i told myself no vulgarities
the 2nd biggest regret in my life is running away from the opportunity to train with them during Dec, FUCK IT, if only i wasnt so humji& fickle.
but NVM, floorball netball house comm !
ill just have to rally then, wah but im not eloquent& im crowd-shy.

alternatively i can take comfort in Nathanael's comment last night.
meh that'd be like, stupid, i know.

*

CAN I JUST SAY THIS ONCE& FOR ALL.
if you guys actually miss (hearing my shit or anything about) me so much& you wanna be updated about my life then you jolly well ask me.
dont fucking try to dig out shit about me from your sources because its fucking RUDE.
i take it as you dont wanna lose contact with me but the way you people are doing it, it's like you cant wait to lay your hands on some juicy gossip.
its like WHAT THE FUCK, i dont even ask about you guys& if i were to be eager to find out i will fucking ask YOU& no one else.
basic respect, this is.
im not gonna be coming up with some euphemism that goes like "ahh this means i actually have a place in your hearts", IM NOT GOING to do that.
instead i shall divert my attention to limiting my expletives, maybe the particular friend's right, girls really shouldnt say too much of it.

&no Nana, Amelia, i dont blame you girls.

♥ XOXO ♥